Wilpon Management Interview Script

 

Here we go. Today's the most momentous occasion in recent memory. It's Met management firing day. Or so we've been promised. We don't want to let the excitement get out of hand, but we've been waiting a long time for this.

 
Every October, the Mets and their friends gather to participate in the ritual burial of their team's season

I got my hands on the actual crib-sheet that Jeffy and Fred will take into the room once they get around to hiring a new management team for the franchise they have run into the ground.  I feel this gives us some insight into the process.

PART ONE (oral Interview):

GM:
has skill set YES NO
has plan YES NO
likes his plan YES NO
can keep it in pants YES NO
has figured out we're broke YES NO
likes the Dodgers' chances in 2011 YES NO
knows anything about how to treat concussions YES NO

Manager:
can light up room YES NO
works cheap YES NO
ex-Yankee with rings YES NO
will say what we tell him to YES NO
doesn't mind if we lie occasionally YES NO
double check: is room really lit up? YES NO

PART TWO (written test for all candidates):

Please comment on the management strategy implied by the following pictures: