Let's Change the Subject

uh, taxi!

I took in yesterday's game on the radio function of MLB tv, watching along with the supposedly "improved" Gameday. I snoozed along pleasantly to the radio, until I heard Reyes was limping, the news of which sat me bolt upright with terror. Anyhow, MLB's Gameday is like the car fitted with all sorts of gimmicks, but that's timing belt snaps after 20,000 miles. They have all sorts of 3-D gimmicks, but the very basic core functions of the service, e.g. the score, who's up at bat, etc., all continually fail, malfunction or stall. I imagine the premium MLBtv "mosiac" service is the same, because this kind of incompetence is MLB's trademark, though I can't say I was foolish enough to fork over the extra cash for the promise of a better product and the opportuntiy to watch six tiny buffering screens at once instead of one tiny buffering screen. Meanwhile, the media (at least those who obviously don't use MLBTV) fawn all over MLB's media strategy, and I wonder in what crazy world my constantly buffering laptop can be considered an improvement over Marconi's radio? I guess this to be expected in a world where they repackaged the walkman as an ipod and set the world on fire. Somebody, quick put flash memory in a hula hoop and we'll make millions together!

Ok, the game. Agent Glavine wasn't terrible, but I just have no confidence in him at Turner. And the Br*ves have served notice that they are not planning to go easily. No surprises there. And one Shawn "It ain't easy being" Green has served notice that he plans to bedevil Metsfans with his untimely errors and occasional hitting. Delgado had a bad day too, but I have to abide by my oath to never criticize him, an oath taken in the presence of Satan and bluesman Robert Johnson at the crossroads on the occasion of Omar trading someguyswedontremember for this beautiful, massive left-handed offense machine of a 1st baseman. So I can't really get too worked up about yesterday's loss to the hated Atlanta Klansmen.

Instead, let's take out our anger in a safe, responsible way. Let's bash ESPN's preposterous "Power Rankings"

The bozos in charge of this waste of virtual space made the mistake of trying to justify their rankings in public, and of course were filleted in the new espn comments section.

Let's cut through the pomp and circumstance and get to the point: The Yankees lead off our 2007 Power Rankings as the No. 1 team in the land.

But before anyone accuses us of East Coast bias, or cites the Yankees' mundane 1-1 record, or alludes to their error-filled display Thursday, remember these two points:

1. For our first Rankings, we've leaned heavily on the predicted standings from our ESPN.com contributors, who in all their wisdom picked the Yankees to win more games than any team in the majors.
2. The Yankees have played two games. Only 160 to go. If the first week mattered that much, the 3-0 Pirates would be in the top five.

But that's enough on the Bombers. They are followed closely by the AL champion Tigers, the archrival Red Sox and the crosstown Mets, who've blazed to a 3-0 start.

How'd the Cardinals fare? They debut at perhaps the lowest point (No. 18) of any defending champion in the Power Ranking era. And in their case, we had to factor in their first three games against the Mets. By the way, someone alert us when they score another run.

I look for advertising on this page, because if they are not trying to lure me in and sell me something, I'm not sure what they're trying to do here. It makes no sense. It's pointlessly self-contradictory. It isn't even effective at stirring up controversy, because it is so obviously invalid. It certainly isn't journalism or entertainment. Rumors of an ESPN Yankers Red Sox bias don't really bother me, since I don't take ESPN, or anyone who employs Steve Phillips, seriously. Further, I am not just sticking up for the Mets (3-0 at the time of the column, having just outscored the world champions 300-2), who found themselves "NL'd" by these hosers who judge the Yankers, beating up on weak competition (actually going 1-1), to be more "powerful" than the Mets who shellacked the world fucking champions like they were a red-headed step-Looper.

I'm just tired of lazy baseball reporting and journalism. To be honest, and this is no offense meant to the blogs, the stuff I read on blogs these days is fast surpassing the crap I read or hear from the talking heads of the industry (yes Dawn Perry, I'm talking to you). It's no longer enough to give the fan a simpleminded storyline, and reporters just don't seem to grasp that they don't have informational comparative advantage anymore. Even when someone like Rosenthal comes on Fox today to give us the scoop, you can tell by his eyes that he knows the jig is up--the common press, is by and large, no longer in a possition to tell us something we don't already know. "Pedro's making progress." No shit, Ken, my goldfish knows that! Even the "insiders," guys who played or GM'd in the actual game seem bankrupt and misused; witness the innane "predictions" each network feels bound to have their talking heads to force on us--they are so out-of-touch sometimes its unbelievable.

Seriously ESPN, stick to reporting the scores. Or return to making up funny nicknames.

This is why the quality of analysis will, I submit, become increasingly important in the near future--bloggers don't need boneheads like Perry to stir up debate, or make stat-head arguments, we can collectively do that better than they can. If baseball had some more entertaining personalities behind its desks and in its booths (I'm thinking Sir Charles Barkley here), charismatics that fans want to hear blab about their opinions (I'm thinking Keith Hernandez), then maybe it would help.

Even the beloved Sportsguy, the only thing espn has going for it, other than its headquarters being far enough inland in Connecticut to avoid the worst repercussions of the coming global warming triggered sea-level rise of 2008, is kind of sucky lately. Take his lame Dice-K first game running diary blog. Please! There are two major differences between my attempts at in-game, live blogs and this one. 1) Mine were funny, and 2) No one read mine.

Let's go Mets.