I Don't Gotta Believe

Christmas sucks for Mets fans and Jeff Franchise is here to prove it.

I am here to reminisce about that wonderful winter of 2001, when Jason Bay had yet to be traded from the Mets and when dreams took wing. Those were the days of $95 million payrolls, when Steve Phillips played rotisserie baseball before it was cool, the days when the Mets would back away from any player with a back problem, and that was our biggest problem.

Obligatory Steve Phillips' mistress photo.

The interwebs were just catching on in the sports world, and people still read the beat writers on the NY Post webpage. I remember clearly salivating over the prospect of Juan Gonzalez joining the Mets. Oh, what an offensive contribution he'd make. Plus, Juan's friends were saying things like:''Juan has never wanted anything more in his life than he wants" to be a Met.

The Mets thought it would be easy. After Juan Gonzalez said he wanted to join them, the Mets figured they would make the best offer, Gonzalez would take it, and their supersized lineup would have even more meat. Last night, the Mets learned, the story was too good to be true.

Of course, Juan Gone, probably high on the steroids at that very moment, bent Steve Phillips over and took Texas' offer instead. Phillips, who was probably fucking an intern at the time, didn't even really want Gonzalez. Stevo recovered nicely and put together the 2002 Mets, with Mo, Roberto, Jeromy, and Shawn Estes, who went 75-86, a record good for 5th place.

Flash forward to the waning days of the Omar Minaya regime. Minaya has done everything short of trading Tom Seaver to bury this franchise, and during this hot stove, most likely his last winter as a big league GM, he's taking the cautious route, with his cell phone thumb lodged securely in his ass. Of course, Omar's inactivity is arguably a good thing even though the Mets have more holes than a thing that has a lot of holes, since this market is dominated mostly by players that will be overpaid because of the weak competition, and since Omar not doing anything is a good thing. But I still feel some nostalgia for the time when the representatives of free agents would have their friends spread lies in the media about wanting to be a Met.

There's still plenty of time for things to get worse. There isn't a Metsfan alive who wants Benjie Molina's fat ass to don the Orange and Blue, and there are a few dead who don't want Omar to go to two years on the contract. Even if the Mets land Bay, widely seen as the suboptimal choice, they will probably end up bidding against themselves since all of the big players seem to have moved on.

But hey, Kelvim Escobar!!

So Happy Holidays!! Try not to think about the Mets!