It's Mets For Me: Off-Beat, Tangentially Relevant Mets Ruminations

Off Base Since 2005! Mets commentary from the counter-intuitive to the unintuitive and all the intuitives in between. ** "Through the use of humor and gross inaccuracy...a certain truth can be gained." Rob Perri ** (pester me or follow me @itsmetsforme on twitter)

Friday, December 12, 2008

Doh'mar: Dumb Shit Omar's Saying
Omar Minaya discusses the size of Aaron Heilman's love handles.

According to Fanhouse, Omar "had a simple message for the folks in New York who keep bothering him when he goes out to get his morning bagels. "To you Mets fans, we've addressed the bullpen by getting Mr. Putz," he said.

Thanks for clarifying that Omar. Who else cares? Would it have too been tasteless to begin his statement "To you Mariners fans..."? Did the original speach have a passage starting "To you Aaron Heilman fans"...? He just blathers on and on.
Omar welcomes K-Rod to the Mets.

This winter has been dreary without mention of Bean Stringfellow. Ol' Bean is probably in his castle made of marzipan lording over the other elves and counting the money he made on Billy Goat Wagner's huge contract. If you're into this kind of thing, go compare November 2005's reports about Wags the Tongue , Mr. best available closer, with this week's signing of the best available closer. If you don't have the time, let me just whet your appetite with some remarks relevant to contemporary concerns:

Wagner, [who chose the Mets over resigning with his old club the Philadelphia Phillies] again distinguished between the Mets who, he said, were intent on winning, and the Phillies, whom he characterized as "trying to be competitive."

Sigh. If John Franco was our Korean War (never ended), Armando was Vietnam (a bad idea, a morass) , Goat was the Gulf War '91 (seemed like a sucess at the time but apparently didn't go far enough). What's next?

Now that we don't have Willie to kick around any more, let's do tune into Omar's frequency, courtesy of Steve Popper who has some truly Amazin' Stories...

Omar on getting another good starter:

"I can be a player - but depending on where the dollars are going," Minaya said. "The (number). two and three, you see what the price is going for right now - the $15-plus (million) range. I don’t know if that ballpark is an area we're going to be able to (be at), understanding not only do I have a $27 million pitcher this year (Johan Santana), but I have to carry Billy (Wagner’s) money. I’m carrying a lot of money back there. We'll free up something next year ,but I’m carrying a lot of money."

Interesting use of rhetoric to make it seem as though he is passively accepting a restraint imposed from elsewhere. Who made you carry a lot of money back there, Omar? Who? Is it that guy in the mirror? Is it? Answer me dammit. You're a "player" are you?

On being about to make a dumb wrong move:

Minaya said he didn't anticipate spending on a bat, dedicating his dollars to finishing up the pitching staff.

NoooOOoooOOOooo! Not dumb because the Mets don't need pitching mind you. If you watched the Mets for any time at all recently you can see they need a offensive chemistry adjustment (not the same as signing anti-dinosaur self injuring players, mind you.) In baseball, offense is tightly linked to bats, the kind Omar doesn't anticipate spending on.

On Castillo, who is hated by his manager and a good part of the fanbase after being senselessly signed to a mulityear contract by Doh'mar.

"Right now, Castillo's going to be our second baseman," Minaya said. "I know he didn't have a good year, I know it's tough for him to come back. But this guy's been an All-Star, and a two-time World Series winner, a .300 hitter for 10 years.

When you have the kind of year that he has and you've got three years left, there's not many teams that are exactly going to be jumping and knocking down the door for Luis Castillo, you know what I'm saying? The cost issue will have to be kind of weighted, but the bottom line is he's our second baseman. He's not a player that there's a great market for him based upon the year he had last year."

We know, Omar. We know what you're sayin. In fact we knew it before you outbid the Astros for his services. We know it, not because we're omnipotent bloggers (although we are), but 'cause we used something my pappy used to call common fucking sense.

Amazin' Stories is a good description of the kind of stories Omar likes to tell a lot. "Maine was my main target." "Ollie was my goal all along." I needed to sign Pedro to get Beltran. Etc.
Minaya says he was motivated to upgrade the bullpen by his wish not to get shivved again in spring training.

Cole Hamels, the last time he talked smack to anyone.

The Pop-star is also reporting that Cole Tadpole Hamels is flapping his lips. Luckily for him he is picking on the folding chair of baseball, the NY Mets' pride. When old Jimmy Rollins talked smack, what did the Mets do? A year later, after collapsing and signing the best free agent pitcher on the planet, the Mets got around to having their firey centerfielder respond. Then they folded again.

Here's what Daryl Strawberry had to say about the matter, courtesy of Metsblog:

“That’s sad… If we had a team say that about us – oh, no – they were gonna be in trouble… I mean, it would definitely be hard if, in the days us playing, if somebody said that, I mean, we’d have stuck one right in his neck. We’d be fighting. There’s no way any one would be allowed to disrespect us like that, and that is what has happened to the Phillies.”

What's sad to me is that Straw puts it in painful perspective. Hellya, those 80s Mets didn't wait til someone said something like Cole Haan did, they didn't need an excuse. Jeesh Straw was taking swings at his teammates during photo day!

I know some fanboys don't like this kind of talk, that the Mets have no fight in them, but until this club shows it can triumph over adversity, they're the LA Lakers of the MLB, talking a bigger game than they play. Soft and weak and not champions.

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  • At 9:31 AM, Anonymous Andrew said…

    I haven't put my two cents in here in a while, my old friend, but now I'm back again to say: Stick to writing funny things. You sound like the people in the Metsblog comments when you get angry. :P

    And let me add: There is almost no such thing as offensive chemistry. The baseball offense is the most individualized part of any of the four major professional sports. When you're at the plate, it's between you and the pitcher, and you're not somehow hitting better because you like Ted over there on second base.

    The Mets had a very good offense last year and will in all likelihood have a very good offense again next year. If their bullpen didn't implode over and over and over again, ad nauseam, they would have easily -- EASILY -- won the division.

    I'm all about dumping Luis Castillo and I do think Manny Ramirez is a good fit for this team if they're willing to add payroll, but with a good bullpen the Mets probably would have taken down the World Series last year. That has now been addressed, at least in part. Now they need a starting pitcher -- preferably not Jason Marquis.

  • At 5:24 PM, Anonymous cver said…


    To correct you, oh sage, I will once again swear on a stack of bibles (or somehow the archive probably can be found) that I heard Omar in April of 06, after the Benson trade, tell WFAN that Maine was the main player he was seeking. Now, Andrew, I do believe that there are some elements of a team's offense that are colaberative and are helped by a certain degree of chemistry. Just one example is that if you have a great classic basestealing leadoff man like Reyes, you need a guy behind him who can handle the bat and put the ball in play - who doesn't strike out much, which would cause the strike-him-out-throw-him-out double play. I also believe that the Mets offense was good last season, but inconsistent and not what I would call great. Their bats would get cold - the often recalled occasions where great hitters like Wright, etc. couldn't bring runners home from 3B with nobody out when playoff berths were on the line. But also, that bottom of the order, particularly weighed down with the dead weight of Castillo and Schneider needs to be addressed. We have to wonder how Delgado and Church will be this season also (in 08, they seemed to alternate - Church - first half and Delgado - second half). Now that Show has been shown the Dooh, let's get Lowe!!!

  • At 5:52 PM, Blogger Jaap said…

    fucking sour puss.

    "Ol' Bean is probably in his castle made of marzipan lording over the other elves and counting the money he made on Billy Goat Wagner's huge contract"

    I love this shite.

    you've outdone yourself. brill, mate.

  • At 5:59 PM, Blogger Jaap said…

    cole hamels?




    you see, convenience shopping

  • At 11:11 PM, Blogger I.M. Forme said…

    Well (show'n) Blow me down!!

    Omar knows how to clean house and play house (with other people's money).

    Andrew welcome back--you can see I've kept this thing afloat without your guidance but I do hope you'll stop back more than once every 3 years.

    You and Cver can spout all the "facts" and "knowledge" you like, but at the end of the day I'll still go with my gut, like a great former yankee 2nd baseman once taught me, and remember history the way it ought to be remembered whether or not it actually "happened" that way.

    Jaap thanks for your comments. Someone has to balance all the irrational exuberance you've been piping into the Metsblargosphere lately.

    Andrew: "you're not somehow hitting better because you like Ted over there on second base." Fair enough, but that Ted over there isn't Ted Williams for these Mets (couldn't come up with any Teds that played secondbase) and I still agree with Cver, the Met bats have gone cold at the same time too many times. And we can't get rid of the core. So tweaking is necessary, which is what I mean, get a guy whose hitting menstrual cycle (pardon the metaphor) doesn't sync with the other two or three useful bats, a guy like Manuel Ramirez or Texiera. That's not what Omar seems to do, so I think we now pray that he fills in the line up with some less high profile professional hitters. As constituted they can't get it done; moving away from the chemistry metaphor, I'd say they need an offensive tune-up.


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