It Was Hard in the Beginning, But Mets' Dickey Refuses to Go Limp

Fun facts about Dickey:
On August 17, 2008, Dickey tied the record for most wild pitches in an inning, with 4.

Alright, I think I've gotten Dickey out of my system now.  Almost.  The Mets were able to salvage one blasted victory from another forgettable series.  This is the club we expect really, not the one that stole two series in a row from their main rivals. And, as has been widely reported, we can count the Mets GM, perfectly happy to snag that one game in each series, as a fellow traveler.

 
I want to formally propose here that if the Mets rotation looses any more members to injury or insanity (i.e. Mike Pelfrey), the management needs to take the opportunity to turn its energy to stocking the clubhouse with knuckleballers. What could be more appropriate for this clown-show of an organization? The Mets cannot win if they play fair, so I want to see knuckleballers in the rotation, bullpen, and hanging from the rafters.   Imagine what this would do for John Maine's fastball.

Just to show I'm not kidding, I will profile a potential acquisition here in this space.  Eri Yoshida, Japan's "Knuckle Princess" is doubtlessly available.  The only balls she has are knucklers. She has "dimples and a sidearm knuckleball."  She is now a professional baseball pitcher, which is more than I can say for Oliver Perez or Fernando Nieve.  It says here she has what it takes to be the next Kaz Matsui. End profile.  Omar Minaya needs to have Shinjo place an introductory call on behalf of the Mets, and make this happen.  More on this campaign later, but here's a potential motto: "The NY Mets: Knuckleballers on the Mound, Knucklehead's in the Front Office."


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On to the real news of the day.  Managers often like to establish roles for their bullpen guys, to give them a sense of stability, of when and how they'll be used, or in the case of Jerry's Kidz, misused.  It looks like Jerry has hit upon Oliver Perez' role with the Mets in the aftermath of Doh'P's second refusal of a minor league assignment. Jerry plans to use him in extra-innings or "something like that."

In the best tradition of tabloid journalism, the Post has some tasty anonymous player quotes on this most recent Ollie disaster (suck it bloggers!):

When told that Manuel’s plan is to save Perez for extra-inning games, one of the Mets players laughed.
“What, we need another 20-inning game and then use him after we’ve used all our pitchers and if a position player’s sinker isn’t biting?” the player said.

Hahahahahaha. That's great stuff, Angel Pagan.  We know it's you.  Everything is better in life when there are players in a clubhouse willing to whisper cold truths to beat reporters. And what does Ollie have to say for himself?

“I want to stay here.”

The good news here is that the organization is finally in a spot where the reality of the state of Perez' suckitude (that's suckiness and poor attitude combined), and the enormity of the mistake it was resigning him, just cannot be escaped.

MLB Trade Rumors charitably tries to determine potential trading scenarios for Oliver Perez now that he's shit the bed while screwing the pooch. Perhaps the swapping of a really really bad contract?

Gary Matthews Jr.'s contract qualifies as equally bad, but he's already on the Mets.

Oh well, thanks for trying!

Watching Perez get what is coming to him promises to be one of the highlights of this season.  And I want to hear the announcement from Omar's mouth.

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Several years ago, there was a lot of worry over David Wright's advertising partners.  For instance, should he or his representatives really be associating Wright's image with a "Reverend Dr." who endorsed exorcism and the drinking of fecal matter, among other things?  If you thought Dr. Jaerock Lee and the Salvation Miracles Revival Crusade was sketchy, get a load of the company Wright is keeping now! Indeed, post beaning David Wright may be sliding into old bad habits.

I refuse to post a picture of the "Situation" here.

Wright needs to get right at the plate, sure, but first he needs to look into new representation.

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"Things I Can't Believe Didn't Happen to the 2009-10 Mets" Dept.

 I'm sure I am not the only one claiming that I have always been critical of the ridiculous regular season jump up and down celebrations on home plate, but I will still claim my piece of smug vindication pie.  Angels star Kenny Morales broke his fucking leg diving into one of these idiotic victory piles after beating the Mariners in May! So...I told you so.  Now stay posted for the player braining on the preposterous "Tal's hill" and pole in Houston's centerfield!
 
 Click this now while you still can!