It's Mets for Me Can't Stand Ya 81 edition

EDITOR'S NOTE: As we celebrate our second anniversary we cast around for special features to add to the site, features that would really enhance your experience as a reader of novelty sports blogs as they brought us, artistically, up to a new level. We didn't come up with anything. Anyhow, here is the first entry into what we hope will be a regular feature in this space. Today we welcome guestblogger Constnza81 to the fold. This is because we are eager to sample the perspective of some of Metsnation's brightest internet stars, NOT because Constnza81 has agreed to release my dog, Snoogums, back into my care if I gave into his demands.

Celebrating Two Year's of Snarky Commentary and Miniscule Readership

I can't remember if it was two years ago where a sarcastic and witty blogger named ItsMetsForMe first caught my attention with his observations about Manny Aybar and Jose Offerman. To say he changed the landscape of Met's-related blogging then is an understatement — or overstatement, I always confuse the two. Either way, IMFM, as he's affectionately referred to by those too lazy to write out his entire name, has used that two year's to build an empire that's read by few and loved by fewer, truly a testament to his genius. As an avid reader, I know I can browse his page, and find a great entry every day — unless he's too busy to post or gets bored or forgetful. I know his polls are frequently updated and fresh and are always accurate since only a handful of visitor's actually participate. IMFM has also been able to create a slew of infrequently updated spin-off pages. I still haven't figured out what “The Deuce” is all about, but I'm sure it was meant to be funny. That's what's really important.

IMFM's influence on the rest of the blogging community is without bounds. We all recognize that the word Br*ves, will never contain an “A” again, unless it's being typed by someone who is ignorant to IMFM's ruminations. His vivid blue font in the HotFoot bleachers on gameday makes this star in the making instantly recognizable.

Join me in saluting IMFM by visiting his page an extra two or three times this week, bringing his overall readership to 12.

Constzy: Guest Blogger or Internet Stalker?

After months of hounding, IMFM has finally relented and allowed me to submit a guest column. I initially promised him my submission before the weekend was finished, but I was so caught up with the Mets epic sweep of the red-hot Nationals (second best NL East record since whenever the Mets started tanking in June), and the penultimate episode of Big Love, I just couldn't be bothered until 24 hours later. That's called getting off on the right foot.

Controversy (Sex) Sells. There's an old saying in the media “if it bleeds in leads.” I don't know what the blog equivalent is. Let's just say, “it there's a flame war, people read more.” Needless to say, a reputation on the Internet is always earned by playing nice. Matt Drudge became a media star when he broke a story about some intern becoming sexually involved with the President of the United States. While I'm yet to break a story of that nature, I do have a knack of following up every rational, intellectual post I make with some psychotic, impulsive ranting. In other words, I'm just what the doctor ordered for IMFM's blog. I am the SoCo to his lime.

More Unabashed Omar Love: Yes, "O" has a penchant for signing lots of really old guys while picking up other players off the trash pile -- I mean, how can I constantly defend someone who's traded away a plethora of talent this season that isn't exactly All-Star caliber, but certainly useful in a pennant race caliber? This year's bullpen is shaky at best, and horrifically awful at worst. But he's Omar, and I love him, you know what I'm saying?

Oh Yeah. The Mets Have a Good Weekend:

Since I'm assuming I'm going to earn my paycheck around here actually blogging about some interesting in game action, let me just say it's always a good weekend when you can beat around a bottom feeder and gain two games on the team's behind you in the process. Apparently, while the Mets were playing souless, malaise-like ball against two below .500 clubs, the spirited, rejuvenated, unbeatable because they got a new cleanup hitter but no starting pitching upgrade Atlanta Br*ves lost 4 of 6, and are now further back in the standings than where they were when they made their dramatic upgrades at the trade deadline. Meanwhile the Phils are still the Phils and I refuse to treat them like a threat until they have a pitching rotation that stretches beyond “King” Cole Hamel's and Jamie “Is this a Goiter?” Moyer. Maybe they can draft some pitcher named “Jimmy Ellington” and then the Phillie faithful can call him Jimmy “Duke” Ellington. Or perhaps an Italian kid name Marco Prima who they can nickname Marco “Louie” Prima.