It's Mets For Me: Off-Beat, Tangentially Relevant Mets Ruminations

Off Base Since 2005! Mets commentary from the counter-intuitive to the unintuitive and all the intuitives in between. ** "Through the use of humor and gross inaccuracy...a certain truth can be gained." Rob Perri ** (pester me or follow me @itsmetsforme on twitter)

Tuesday, April 24, 2007

Willie Randolph: Handler of Men?

This thing is called "Dinger."

Statement Gary Cohen wishes he could take back: "Willie is an excellent handler of men."

I wonder what noted Br*ves gay-bashers and all-around asswipes from Hillbilly Hill, John Smoltz and Todd Jones, their intolerance unfairly overshadowed by uber-bigot Br*ve John (Off-His) Rocker, think about this? Or Keith Hernandez' coat, for that matter.

(For those of you unfamiliar with John Smoltz or the non-Rocker related history of Br*ve bigotry--not to be confused with br*ves infidelity or wife-beating*-- his 2004 remarks on legalizing gay marriage, "What's next, marrying an animal?" not only alienated gay rights advocates and fair minded baseball fans, but also enraged a good percentage of the Atlanta fanbase, for obvious reasons. Luckily for his endorsement deals, Smoltz remained silent on "marrying your sister" and was thus able to retain the allegiences of most non-farmer Br*ve fans.)

I admit to being slightly distracted by the Br*ves-Fish game when Cohens comment got my attention. I have to guess he was referring to Willie's roster management, not his shower time ettiquette. However, as far as the bullpen goes, I have to say, the evidence points to the "Silly Willie" thesis. While he has got a handle on the double switch, I don't think he has figured that out yet.The debate will continue to rage over whether Cohen's (mis)statement is accurate, for example over at Metropolitans.

Imagine the fun if the Rockies acquired empiricist and probable 'roid rager, Carl Everett!

Other than not seeing KAZMAT and his amazin arm-hose perform, there was very little dissapointing about yesterday's action. The Mets stuck up their obligatory 6-8 runs thanks to Stashpower, and Maine was quietly effective, even though he continues to look like someone woke him from nap time. The Fish almost blew it, thanks to our old friend Henry Owens, but they held on to their lead over the Br*ves and helped install our Mets back in first.

Tonight, the Mets continue their meetings with the friendly visitors from the land of high-altitude non-contention. Aside from being the c-Rockies, the Colorado thin air bashers do boast a formidable middle of the order, so it will be interesting to see which Ol' Duque shows up tonight.

To pass the time until game time, check out Sandomir's critique of the ESPN broadcast of the Sawx-Yankers. My take? High on Jeter, and saddled with amiable buffoon Joe Morgan and some complacent producers, ESPN is just coasting, their mediocrity ruining the minds of a new generation of baseball fans.

*for a remarkable and disturbing round-up of all the professional sports wife beating that is going on, go here. Benitez and Astacio, Wil Cordero, apparently as shameful in private as they are in public, top the list for the Mets.

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This blog is meant completely and entirely in jest, unless you count the angst, and is not meant to offend anyone, unless you are a Br*ves fan. It's not affiliated with Sterling, the Mets, common sense, good taste, or anything really.