It's Mets For Me: Off-Beat, Tangentially Relevant Mets Ruminations

Off Base Since 2005! Mets commentary from the counter-intuitive to the unintuitive and all the intuitives in between. ** "Through the use of humor and gross inaccuracy...a certain truth can be gained." Rob Perri ** (pester me or follow me @itsmetsforme on twitter)

Saturday, April 16, 2011

What's My Opinion of Tulowitzki's Performance? Collins Needs to Go All Lasorda on Us
Does this man hold the our entertainment?

Let's just say, for the sake of argument, that the Mets we have seen so far (somehow worse than ever) are the Mets as they truly are, give or take a false-hope inducing streak or two. Let's also admit, that to put it in the most sensitive terms possible, the Mets are finally "rebuilding." The D'ohfense is streaky to non-existent as usual. The defense is laughable to uninspired. Their ace is injured and some significant portion of the fanbase has deluded itself into believing that a journeyman knuckleball pitcher, refined as he may be, can backbone this same sorry sack of losers into contention. The Mets won't be spending any money soon and the team could very well be sold. And it is probably only a matter of time before the management starts to float the argument that the team can finish in last place just as easily without David Wright and Jose Reyes. The consequence of these lean times is that we are going to see some awful baseball this season, and perhaps even experience a new level of misery when the Mets rid themselves of their best players. That is not entertaining.
Tommy has helped us before.

So what can we hope for in the way of entertainment? I submit that "fiery" new Mets fall guy manager Terry Collins holds the key to any satisfaction Mets fans are likely to enjoy this year. What I am calling for is some cathartic ranting, some truly out of control tirades from our manager. Does screaming at the players, media or fans raise the team winning percentage or accomplish anything at all?  Of course not. But, in an important way, Terry's ass is covered because there is no way any one is going to say this team has "quit" on Terry, not with the start the team has gotten off to. To "quit" you have to actually start, start playing baseball in this case. What kind of screaming yelling, reporter demeaning, buffet attacking awesomeness would I like to see from Collins? For inspiration, Terry need look no further than Tommy Lasorda whose colorful rants can and should be sampled here. Some fans hated it when Jerry Manuel would woo the beat reporters with his maniacal cackling, but funny stories might just help us get through the next few months.

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  • At 6:36 PM, Anonymous Cver said…

    It certainly is easy to be speechless when it comes to the 2011 Mets, so this season, you might be up for even more of a challenge than Terry Collins. Just glad to see him push all the buttons like a late September contending team bringing in the starters to do their side sessions against the cursed BR*VES. It all worked out, so that we can stay close to our goal of winning a game every 9 days. Hopefully after beating us in a doubleheader yesterday, those baby-eaters will have been satiated enough to get through until their next Deliverance-style banquet.

  • At 10:48 AM, Blogger I.M. Forme said…

    what a victory!!
    Omar's demands of one out of three or so were way too high. This team is more comfy with winning one out of eight. Let's go Mets!!

  • At 11:01 PM, Anonymous Cver said…

    Y'know how it seems each of our last array of hapless managers has had a hook - a catchphrase that has lived on - well, I have already identified Terry's. Here's the list direct from the Mets Hall of Shame:

    Arthur Howe: "We battled"

    William Randolph: "I went with my gut"

    Jerry Manuel: "I'm a gangsta"

    Terry Collins: "We're better than this"

    Sounds like the new slogan for the team - start the ad campaign:


  • At 2:26 PM, Blogger I.M. Forme said…

    of course, they're not better than this.


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