It's Mets For Me: Off-Beat, Tangentially Relevant Mets Ruminations

Off Base Since 2005! Mets commentary from the counter-intuitive to the unintuitive and all the intuitives in between. ** "Through the use of humor and gross inaccuracy...a certain truth can be gained." Rob Perri ** (pester me or follow me @itsmetsforme on twitter)

Friday, June 26, 2009

Choking Mets Choke It All Over the Choking Place
We already know which of these two fellas has the deeper voice, but which guy has the better arm?

Think I'm being too harsh? After all, these replaceMets can hardly be expected to keep up with the mighty Yankee$, right? Why am I playing the choke card now, when they haven't even begun to wheeze and gag?

It's the way that they do it. When the Mets fall apart with shitty pitching and multiple errors, that's called Mets baseball. When they completely fall apart in abnormally humiliating clusterfuck fashion, they must be playing the Yankees. When the umps get in the act (you call that an infield fly rule?) well, that's history baby. First base chUmpire Chris Guccioni's back pocket must have been nice and plump with the envelope of cash the Yankers gave him (a bad investment, given the Mets preference to give runs away for free) for senselessly ringing up Mets who actually might have gotten on against Sabathia.

I hate that they get all nervous, instead of taking their lumps with quiet dignity. Wright yips it up. Cora throws away a double play ball. Evans invents a new error, the first base bobble-de-fuck. Pelfrey gives it up to the pitcher and the Spanks bat around. Sure, Pelfrey got dinked to death in the 2nd, but I excuse myself for being disgusted at Pelfrey for giving up a hit to the pitcher. Pelf doesn't seem to be learning to pitch. I'm fed up. Lose with integrity, you bozos!!

More random bitching.

Darling talked about how Pelfrey doesn't use his secondary pitches early and then pays for it when hitters sit on his sinker. Predictable Pelfrey. What is it that Dan Warthen does again?


The Mets are admitting that Oliver Perez' knee is no longer a problem. That seems like a dumb move. There's pain in the John Maine--Perez plays with no Braainn!

I spent most of the game trying to decide who had oranger skin and/or less likable personality, Alex Rodriguez or his new lady, Kate Hudson, who was watching from the (empty) expensive seats. I came to no conclusions.

In what is certainly not a scoop, Scoop Jackson is urging Pedro to call it quits permanently.

During the part of the SNY broadcast I was awake for, Keith called Cowbell Man "the guy that makes all that racket." I'm with Mex, the Won'tpons (as Jdon calls them) did something right if they designed $itifield so as to make this nuisance's presence less palpable... Keith then yawned while Ron explained pitching grips in the 6th. He just does or says whatever he wants and it's charming, kind of like a mustached IMFM.

The Yankers are definitely inviting the Mets to their next birthday party. Struggling for runs? Get healthy against the Mutts! Professional baseball players know that every team has a bad day and are probably pretty empathetic when they beat the crap out of the other guys, but you just know you can add the Spankers to the list of teams that knows it is "in the Mets heads." That list is headed by the Philmes and the Fish. Coincidentally, this list--of who the Mets can't seem to get up for playing--contains most of Metsfans most hated Met enemies. That's the kind of team we have.



  • At 4:15 AM, Anonymous jdon said…

    Yankee stud vs AAA lineup (and that is being kind)--that is right up their alley. They never beat teams that actually offer some resistance. The Cardinal series was a mirage. If Tim Redding pitches respectably against this lineup tonight, the Yankees are finished. I still cannot figure how he gets anybody out. Guys with mediocre fastballs get eaten alive by this team. Pelfrey again displays a distrurbing lack of poise. He has to stop pounding the fastball when he gets in trouble. Of course, a better breaking pitch might help. We can only hope Burnett's control is screwy tonight, but I think it will take a lot of runs to win. Forget about tomorrow. Livan has never beaten them. If the mets win one I will be happy. Their success will probably depend more on the schizohrenic nature of the yanks than on their own prowess.

  • At 8:20 AM, Blogger Jaap said…

    Redding is a sublime Interleague pitcher - (8.00 ERA) I don't think there could be a bigger mismatch given how bad the Mets looked against Burnett last time out - can they invoke the 10 run rule tonight?

  • At 9:22 PM, Anonymous Put cver out of his misery said…

    Mets got swept in revolting fashion as our esteemed closer disgraced himself with his first capital offense as a Met by walking in the insurance run with a guy who has been instructed not to ever swing the bat and in only his third plate appearance out of probably 600 plus games. Now, rest assured that the Mets have lost the respect of the few remaining delusional holdouts.


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This blog is meant completely and entirely in jest, unless you count the angst, and is not meant to offend anyone, unless you are a Br*ves fan. It's not affiliated with Sterling, the Mets, common sense, good taste, or anything really.